Dreamer

I am a tough juggler or so I think. I often find myself juggling many activities like get a doctor's appt while waiting for my PC to boot up, read news or check kids home work while shaping up on my excercise ball or even plan my day or listen to music or news or pray while driving to work etc. I think I will find my life quite boring if I don't have to juggle many activities at the same time.

I didn't become a juggler by choice though, I am juggler by necessity first and habit second. I am a working mother with 2 high energy kids. I don't want my kids to miss out on any thing because I am busy. I believe the most important of all my duties at this time in my life is making sure my kids turn out okay. So I decided to go with a laser like focus on my momma duties and shape up the rest of my life around it.

Is this good enough, I don't know, I often struggle with that thought. I haven't made any significant contributions to the world except for a little bit of voluntary work here and there. I feel like I am being a thankless greedy consumer of the fruits of other people's sweat without adding anything significant to it. Ofcourse I write computer programs for a living and these programs are being used by people during their day today life, still it doesn't sound as cool as building an artificial heart or installing desert mirrors to help cool earth. I ought to be doing more to pay my dues to my fellow humans... but how?

Maybe someday I will manage to do something more significant..maybe I am going to get that advanced degree in international policy and become part of a think tank that provides policy advice to world leaders. Or maybe I am going to be at the UN or WTO or who knows what..or maybe, just maybe this blog is going to inspire someone somewhere with more talent and drive to be unlike me...